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I’M BACK THANK YOU ALL FOR ALL THE GREAT COMMENTS ON MY LAST POST, YOU ALL ARE GREAT BUDDIES AND I APPRICIATE ALL THE HELP AND SUPPORT! :)   AND TO ROCKET:  WHO THE F**K DO YOU THINK YOU ARE TRYING TO PUT PEOPLE DOWN WHEN YOU HAVE ONLY LOST 27 LBS.  I HAVE LOST MORE THAN YOU IGNORANT B***H!!!  I WILL NOT SIT HERE AND LET YOU INSULT ME OR ANYBODY ELSE BECAUSE THIS SITE IS ABOUT SUPPORT NOT ABOUT PUTTING OTHERS DOWN!!!  SO STAY AWAY FROM MY BLOG BECAUSE YOU DO NOT BOTHER ME AT ALL!!!  27 LBS. IS NOTHING, SO DON’T COME HERE AND TALK SH*T TO PEOPLE WHO ARE HERE TO SUPPORT OTHERS AND ARE LOOKING FOR SUPPORT!!!   YOU ARE SO IGNORANT AND RACIST YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOUR SELF, SO GET A LIFE AND F**K OFF!!!  

OK sorry about that but I can’t stand stupid people! To the great buddies,  that always support me thank you very much, I’m back and ready to do this I had time to think about this and I know that I really want to do this I know I did it before and I know I can do this, I did let my depression get the best of me and I gained alot of weight back but I’m not going to give up, I can’t give up!  I am ready to get back on track… I gained 45 lbs.  and it kills me to think about it but I am strong and I know I can do this, I have lots of great buddies here and I am very thankful :)  I needed time to think… Now I’m back and more ready than ever  I went from 329 lbs. to 374 lbs.  in 3 months.  I know I gained 45 lbs. but I also know that I can do this and I WILL DO THIS!   My depression got in the way but I will not let it get in the way anymore, I will reach my goal and I will win this battle! No more emotional eating, no more crap! I deserve to be happy and healthy and I will fight til the end!!! I gained 45 lbs.  so now I weigh 374 lbs.  But I will lose this weight and I will be healthy and happy! I am done with all the crap and I’m ready to begin a new chapter, wish me luck :)  I wish you all the best and I hope you all do great and don’t forget that I’m very thankful for your support and I’m always here for you guys too :) I apologize about what I said to that person but he has no right to put people down, he doesn’t bother me because to me he’s nothing he’s just ignorant and racist, but I said something because he always attacks people, I hope he gets reported enough to get kicked out of this site forever! :)  GOOD LUCK TO ALL!!!  WE CAN DO THS!!!!!!!! 

I’VE LOST HOPE, I CAN’T GET BACK ON TRACK… I HAVE BEEN TRYING FOR A LONG TIME TO GET BACK ON TRACK BUT ALL I’VE DONE IS GAIN MORE WEIGHT!  I WENT FROM 329 LBS TO 368 LBS. IN 2 MONTHS, I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO, I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO THINK… I GUESS I HAVE TO GIVE UP. I AM VERY UPSET WITH MYSELF FOR GAINING BACK THAT MUCH WEIGHT AND FOR BEING STUPID.  I HATE MYSELF RIGHT NOW, I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS… I THOUGHT I WAS NEVER GOING TO GAIN WEIGHT AGAIN BUT I WAS WRONG, I LOST CONTROL…. I LOST THE BATTLE.   I THINK I’M DONE!  I HATE SAYING THAT I’M GOING TO LOSE WEIGHT AND GET BACK ON TRACK AND ALL I DO IS LOOK STUPID WHEN I WRITE A POST BECAUSE I AM NOT DOING ANYTHING RIGHT, I DON’T KNOW WHAT’S WRONG WITH ME, BUT I FEEL LIKE I LOST MY MOTIVATION… I WAS DOING GREAT I HAD LOST 121 LBS AND I GAINED ALOT BACK. :(  I AM VERY SAD… I DON’T KNOW IF I WILL BE BACK… GOOD LUCK TO ALL.

I’m 354 lbs. today, nothing I do seems to help, I just keep gaining wight… I feel like I failed.  I want to stop eating but it seems like I can’t… I want to get back on track but I honestly don’t know what’s wrong with me…  I want to give up! I had already lost 121 lbs.  and now I’m only down 96 lbs.  I feel sooooooooooo depressed :(  I hate doing this to myself and I hate looking stupid everytime I write a post saying I’m ready, I’m ready, I’m ready, and I don’t do it, I just keep eating!  I don’t know what to say anymore.  I’m going to try my hardest one last time, I’m going to give 200% and I pray to God that I can do it because I really want to lose weight, I don’t want to gain all the weight back… I already gained 25 lbs.  I can’t keep doing this.  I’m tired of failing… I can’t let my depression and emotional eating get the best of me… I have to learn to move on… I have to leave the past in the past.   I will try again…

I know it’s my fault for eating so much but lately I’m just not in to working out or dieting :(  I know there is something bothering me and my emotional eating is back, I really hate this I thought I was back on track but I guess I was wrong.  I really want to go back to eating small meals and working out daily… This sucks :(  I need to stop eating cookies and chips!!! that’s my thing but I can’t gain any more weight I have to stop!  Just thought I would share the way I feel tonight with you all,  hope everyone is doing great :)  I’m not giving up, even though I want to… I’m going to start fresh tomorrow and no more bullshit for real this time because I can’t be wasting time like this just gaining and losing the same 10-20 lbs.    I’m at 351 lbs. again and I have to get down to where I was a couple months ago 329 lbs.  I feel so heavy and lazy when I eat too much, I just feel like a pig :(  I had an entire bag of chips yesterday, the big big bags and like 12 cookies OMG!!!  what was I thinking?!  It’s not worth it because I just feel so guilty afterwards  it sucks…   I don’t want to be overweight by the time I’m 30 and that’s about 5 1/2 yrs. away… I just want to be healthy and happy for once in my life, I can’t stand this weight anymore I feel like I can’t enjoy my life the way I should because I always carry 200-300 extra pounds with me!   :(  OMG!  I need some advice please!  I’m just so sad right now, I know I’m strong but sometimes I need help too.  Thank you in advance for supporting me :)  Tomorrow will be my last chance to do this, I’m not going to mess up anymore, I can’t!   I’m going to toss every piece of junk I have in my snack box, and I’m back to working out and eating small meals, I know I can do this but sometimes it’s just so hard.  I just have to try harder… I will do this!  I know I can!  Wish me luck please :)  WE CAN DO IT!!!

OMG! today I weighed my self again and the scale said 352 lbs. when it was 348 lbs. yesterday! Something is not right, how am I gaining weight so fast????? I am going crazy thinking WTF is going on. =(  It really upsets me and it makes me feel like I failed, THIS SUCKS… It is very frustrating but I plan on killing my self working out just to get back to 329 lbs. like I was almost 2 months ago, I hate the scale now and I am scared of it! I haven’t been drinking enough water or working out as much as I should, but I don’t think anyone could gain 12 lbs. in 3 days! this is crazy, but I have to figure out what is going on, I might have to visit my Doctor to see what he tells me lol.  I am not going to give up though, I’m down 100 lbs. from when I started and to me that is still good, not as good as 125 lbs. but I will get back there! I want to thank everyone for supporting me =) I am here for you guys too. I have to get back on track and do this right! I know I can do it but I have to drink more water and workout more, that’s the hard part for me… but BEAUTY IS PAIN… NO PAIN, NO GAIN! So I have to get over it and do it!  I know alot of you are going through the same thing as me, but don’t feel sad we all have ups and downs, we just have to move on.  So let’s start fresh tomorrow and beat this together… WE CAN DO IT!!!!!  We will do it… =)  Good luck to all.

I feel so sad today, I weighed my self and for some reason the scale says 348 lbs! =( I’ve been doing good, besides yesterday I ate more than I should’ve… But I don’t think I could gain 10 lbs. in a couple days.  I feel crappy because I was doing good, but now that I seen the scale at 348 lbs. I feel sad, it said 348 lbs. yesterday and today.   I don’t know what’s going on but I am not giving up… I don’t care how long it takes me to lose this freaking weight I’m going to fight to reach my goal! I’m not going to give my self any free days anymore because I don’t want to gain more weight, this sucks but I have to keep my head up and move on.  I just don’t know how I gained 10 lbs. in 2 days with only one free day, It’s so frustrating! =(  OMG! well I have to stop typing so I can go workout, I just wanted to share my frustration of the day with you guys lol, I still feel sad but I can’t let this put me down like before.   I said it would be a new me this year, so no more being sad or depressed I’m gonna take my frustration out on my body by working out. I do feel a little disappointed but I gotta move on and try to do better next week, I hope everyone is doing great and don’t forget… Even though we have ups and downs sometimes…. WE CAN DO IT!!!!!  =)

I lost 8 lbs. this week,  I guess I am back on track and I am very happy! I’m glad I’m done with the overeating and all that crap lol. It’s a new year and it will be a new me, I’m not going back to emotional eating because I’ve worked my ass off to lose this weight, and I will not gain it back  because the good food is not worth it!!!   I’m 8 lbs away from losing the 16 lbs. I gained last month and I can’t wait to lose it, I hope everyone is doing great =)  Good luck to everyone, and never give up at all, I almost gave up last month but I got back on track and I am very glad I did… I have a long way to go but now I take it one day at a time.  I wish everyone the best of luck and never forget…. WE CAN DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   =)  No matter how hard it is…. Anything is possible. =)

Happy New Year everyone!!!  I wish you all the best, and I hope we can all stick to our diets =)  I really have to get back on track and stay on my diet, I have to learn to eat small meals during the holidays and I will do it from now on.  I really hate feeling guilty over gaining weight during the holidays just because I can’t say no to all the great food.  But 2010 is here and so is my diet for good!!! I promise!!! Like I said before no more bullsh*t! I was at 329 lbs. about a month ago and now I’m 345 lbs.  I gained 16 lbs. in about a month and it’s not right! I worked my ass off to get to 329 and for me to just be stupid and gain it back… It just kills me. But this new year I am going back on my diet for good, no more breaks, no more over eating and no more excuses.   I have 195 lbs. to go and I plan on doing it in a year and a half, wish me luck =) I wish you all the best for 2010 and remember WE CAN DO IT!!!   Thank you for your support… best of luck to all.

OMG!  I can’t wait for the holidays to be over I just want to be away from all the parties and food.  I’ve gained 17 lbs and I feel really bad but I know this new year will be great, I really hope so…  I will try my hardest to get back on track and it’s not easy but I have to do it because I really don’t want to gain all the weight back, that would kill me…  I want to thank all the buddies that have supported me through all the hard times. I know I said a couple week ago that I was going to stop eating but when you have a family that cooks like crazy is not easy, I just have to learn to be strong and say NO to food and parties… I was doing so good until my depression got the best of me a little while back, but I really want to get back on track and on the 1st day of 2010 I will  go back on my diet for good! No more breaks, no more bullsh*t! I will not gain all the weight back and I will reach my goal I PROMISE!  Thank you all for supporting me and HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL!  WE CAN DO IT!!!

OK, I’ve gained over 10lbs and I am so disapointed in my self.  I’ve been doing horrible lately and I am very ready to get back on track, I want to do this for my health and to feel better about my self…  christmas is over and so is my over eating.  I will do this and I am setting a mini goal and I will reach it very soon I promise!  In 3-4 months I will reach my mini goal… Back to my diet and exercise =)  Happy Holidays to you all and happy Dieting!!!  WE CAN DO IT!!!!!!!!!  =)